I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
