I met the friendliest cop last night
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
