You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
as a side note pls kill me
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
