after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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