Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I got her a Nickelback box set.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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