If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I skipped work to stalk him.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
