it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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