when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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