well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Randomize
