The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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