Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
home. puking in laundry basket.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
He passed out mid-signature
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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