I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I think I won the penis lottery.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
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