Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
