Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
