before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
only you would photoshop your dick
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Randomize
