You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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