Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(343): View more from Ontario

STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.

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(941): View more from Florida

He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation

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(937): View more from Ohio

You went to church with your boobs hanging out?

(978): View more from Massachusetts

Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.

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(928): View more from Arizona

Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".

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(757): View more from Virginia

He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles

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(516): View more from New York

My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery

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(806): View more from Texas

He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?

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