Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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