i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
