People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
