Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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