I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize