we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Randomize
