So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
