At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
