What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
babies were throwing up all over the place
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
