1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
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