is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
