Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Randomize
