yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
