they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
