you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
