I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
