Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
she smelled like a LAN party
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Randomize
