Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
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