how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Randomize
