You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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