So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
