He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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