He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Randomize
