She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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