my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
