im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
