I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
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