Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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