Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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