Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
