new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
