I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
