I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
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